The Case for the Dinner Party Comeback

If you’ve never been to a dinner party, you’ve at least witnessed one on Mad Men. They’re fun dinners where you invite friends, colleagues, and even potential new friends to join you in your home for a meal and some sort of casual conversation. Here at Late August, we’re big fans of the dinner party and hosting meals, events, and fun activities–so much so, we have an entire section dedicated to it.

Dinner parties are starting to make their way back onto the scene. While they’re not back and trendy yet, we’re placing our bets on the return of the modern dinner party–and for good reason. A dinner party is an opportunity to connect with others and build true community. What better way to do that than over food and drinks in the comfort of our homes?

And, according to psychologist Jerome Burt, PhD, dinner parties can potentially save your life.

The history of the dinner party

Most of us think of dinner parties as an opportunity to break bread with our friends or those we want to get to know better. They’re comforting and comfortable. 

Historically, dinner parties were serious business though. They were the opportunity to network and demonstrate upward mobility. As seen on Mad Men, it was an opportunity to invite important people from work or impress your boss. It was a big deal. However, in the post-WWII era, the middle class began to redefine dinner parties as a more comfortable opportunity to enjoy each other’s company and experience each other’s family or cultural traditions. 

While those fancy informal show-us-all-you-got dinner parties still exist today, those aren’t the ones we’re talking about here. You likely won’t feel safe and comfortable or in a place where true connection can happen. You might even dread going to one of those. That’s not going to do it.

The modern dinner party 

Gone are the days where we feel obligated to wear a sport coat and fancy dress to our friend’s home on a Tuesday night. Of course, we love to dress up occasionally so we won’t decline a fancy dress invitation. Our dinner parties are casual, unpretentious and don’t require any knowledge of which fork or spoon to use. In fact, the extent of our knowledge around that is from repeatedly watching Pretty Woman as kids.

The modern dinner party centers around belonging and food. That’s the only requirement for doing it “right.” Many people quit before they get started hosting a dinner party because they’re overwhelmed. It doesn’t have to be an Instagram-worthy affair. Its pure existence in all of its perfect imperfections is exactly what you and your guests need. And, in our book, that’s Instagram worthy by itself.

So, here’s our pitch to you to start hosting and attending dinner parties:

We need each other. Our society has only become more and more isolated since the pandemic, and we’re seeing the effects of that isolation in our mental and emotional well-being. We’re spending more and more time alone, on our phones, binging streaming shows, and disengaging from the world around us. While we connect through technology and social media, we’re missing out on real life experiences that provide us with the connection and relationships that keep our bodies, minds and souls happy and healthy. The IRL experience can’t really be replicated on social media or on digital platforms. 

Say yes to an invitation if you receive one–even if you have to build up your social tolerance again. It will be worth it. More than likely though, you’ll need to step forward and host your own dinner party to establish the practice within your friend group. 

You can start small with a couple of friends, or a friend and an interesting co-worker. These dinner parties don’t need to be a highly curated affair. They need food–either cooked by you, a potluck, or ordered in. And, they need a willingness to engage in conversation and an interest in others. Everything else is icing on the cake. 

If you want to host your first dinner party, follow some of the guidance we share in the Late August Guide to Hosting a Dinner Party. 

And, stay tuned for dinner party themes, menus, and more.